westbor0baptistchurch: westbor0baptistchurch: how do you get rid of a sore throat?
craplos: ladies. be careful when u wear spaghetti straps. it might distract the boys. they’ll start thinking of spaghetti. they will get hungry. they will stop at nothing to get their spaghetti.
digivolves: joshsux: how do you even sext with girls text her in all caps asking her where the nearest walgreens is
garrisonbabe: “i don’t understand i already went over this with the other detectives.” yes but we’re the winchesters and we’re sexy and totally look like we’re with some other department so look into our gorgeous eyes and repeat yourself, only more honestly because you know you saw freaky shit and you know our gorgeous eyes will believe you the series
creapy: if people get offended by girls not wearing bras because their nipples poke through their shirt then we should require every boy in the world to wear bras too i am so tired of seeing man nipples
asoiafmen: caseydoll: do you ever keep tabs open thinking “eh i’ll get to that later” and then five weeks pass and you still haven’t fucking done anything with it and then Chrome crashes and the entire neighborhood can hear me screaming…
sacaswagea: immergerd: sacaswagea: “if ur ready CUM and get it” haha only 18+ will get this one. :PPP I’m younger than eighteen and I get the joke. Btw, you’re really only supposed to use numbers instead of spelling out the word after one hundred. Or, to be grammatically correct, 100. You’re eighteen, you should know this. is this real life
thesockmonkeyrenegade: gracethelostgirl: lovewithyous: carolineflack: HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY STOP TEXTING YOU HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY START TEXTING YOU HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY
zeldabuddy: travelingmadness: proof-reads ask about 5,000 times before sending proof-reads school essay about 0 times before sending
earthnation: will u still love me when im no longer young and ok looking
vaspim: Dating is so awkward. Whoever my future gf may be, I never wanna meet your parents. Your ass better be a damn orphan. That’s my new policy I only date orphans
lesbianathogwarts: asianpredator: domodisciple: asianpredator: itsdeepforhappypeople: strangeharpy: edgebug: sprightlyvigilante: the year is 2066. physical contact has been outlawed. hug dealers tenderly embrace people in the dead of night and shady people hold hands in dark streets i want to read this novel I want to write this novel. I want to edit this novel. Sounds like...
thecastiel: infinityonhighest: SUPERNATURAL STARTED OUT AS TWO BOYS LOOKING FOR THEIR DAD AND NOW THIS fucking winchesters they’ll pour a glass of water and accidentally start the second Great Flood
ca-lb: thedingledodies: milktree: you can pretend like I dont exist but I still made you whimper like a little bitch when you were about to cum i need this printed on a t-shirt Probably the 100th time I’ve reblogged this.
robertoluongo: in grade 8 i did a power point presentation on “whooping cough” and my opening slide was a photo of whoopi goldberg coughing and i was the only person who laughed at it and i couldnt start the presentation for like five minutes because i was laughing too hard at my own joke
turn-it-up-tune-them-out: artsysauce: sorry I can’t go to school tomorrow I fractured my motivation Guys I said this to my dad once he laughed so hard he let me stay home
eyeslikecominghome: a commercial for dominos was just on and i guess i was lovingly staring at the tv because my mom says to my dad “i wish you still looked at me like haley’s looking at that pizza”
amoying: the bags under my eyes are so heavy because they carry the weight of all my dead hopes and dreams
kill-natalie: surimistick: i was making a lot of mistakes and then my archery instructor said: “you make mistakes because you’re focusing on the target and not on your actions” and i was like woah thanks for giving me the best life advice i’ve ever gotten I just said “that’s brilliant” aloud.
bandbutts: If masturbating while stoned isn’t called weed whacking I don’t know how to live my life anymore
sadpandaxp: egberts: viarga: just-laff: egberts: if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket you are one of the great thinkers of our time Then you’d look at a house and be like “oh damn I wanna live there” and millions of dollars would be in your pockets,...